Wanna Bet?
by blueschist
Summary: Chalis was absolutely disgusting, Blados thought.  She had a nice body, though, but that was the only redeeming quality she possessed.
1. Chapter 1

Ugh. So, I had this idea. I wrote out a couple lines to begin it... and then I left it open on Microsoft Word for a good two weeks. Yeah.  
So, I did what any sensible person would do. I finished it. Quickly.  
Good Riddance.

I don't imagine there to be any chemistry between Blados and Chalis. If there is something going on between them, it would be built purely on sex and mutual dislike.  
I imagine Blados to be an incredibly angry misogynist. I imagine Chalis to be a very beautiful woman who has some very 'unladylike' tendencies.

* * *

Blados liked women. He liked them very much. He also liked getting into fights, blackjack, and scrambled eggs.

Blados hated women. He also hated children, especially if they were smiling. He hated weakness, losing, and salad. Blados hated salads.

Blados hated Chalis. Now, he loved looking at her—she had great legs, which Blados liked—but he found her to be irritating. He had an overwhelming feeling that she was smarter than him.

Personality-wise, Chalis was hideous. She ate like a starving barbarian, mindlessly shoving greasy chunks of food into her mouth. Not at all like a woman _should_ eat. She was vulgar, rude, and sarcastic, especially towards Blados, which was not how he thought women _should_ act. She frequently gambled, something which women _certainly _should not do.

She was also a total whore.

But damn it all, she had some nice legs.

Chalis had a habit of making bets, which, much to Blados' chagrin, she would usually win. Today was no exception.

"Honestly, Chalis, I doubt those stupid kids will even show up, let alone make it through the goddamn ruins."

"Really? I'd rather like to think they will."

"They're just a bunch of useless teenage punks. They'll pussy out at the first sign of anything."

"Really? Well, then…"

He looked at her. She was smiling. Oh _shit_.

"Hmm… How about we make a deal? If those 'pussy teenagers,' as you call them, manage to make it through the Belinsk Ruins, then, well, I win. If not… you understand?"

This was bullshit. Blados would definitely _not_ accept.

"What do I get if I win?"

"I'll do whatever you want."

"Anything?"

"Anything you want, baby."

Blados had a strong suspicion that this was not a good idea. He knew that he should not accept this bet, but- goddamn, those _legs_!

"Fine. Okay."

She didn't say anything. She just looked forward and kept walking, with that same fucking smile.

He inwardly facepalmed at himself. Why had he accepted that bet? He was going to lose, again. And Blados hated losing.

After all, she would probably make him _buy her dinner._ Ugh.

* * *

Lazy ending. I don't care. I just wanted to get this out of the way.

So yeah, this story was originally going to be a couple hundred words longer. You can tell I got bored with this.


	2. Chapter 2

So, uh, the original was supposed to just be a standalone fic but then I got inspiration and now this will probably end up with three chapters or something idk. Whatever. I've been on Tumblr for the past like nine months so that's why I haven't written anything but here it is more pairings I don't ship.

Um yeah. So I don't know if anyone actually ships this, to tell you the truth I don't really either but I sure as hell write it. Because it's funny. And what other reason to write/ship something than because of it's hilarious factor?

Oh well, here it is. Blados x Chalis or something

Does this ship have a name? Does anyone care?

Betshipping? Cardshipping? Wtf, who cares! Call it what you will, I'm just writing it because it's funny and I find Chalis attractive.

* * *

In short news, Chalis had won the bet. The pathetic little twerps had indeed beaten them to the end of the ruins, and had turned out to be less pathetic than Blados had anticipated. This put Blados in a doubly bad mood. First losing to a woman, and then losing to a ragtag group of teenagers, _two of which were also women._ Blados frowned even more, so as to express his anger to the world, but nobody could tell, since he wore a mask. It was clear that he had never really thought his wardrobe through.

"Well, that worked out well, didn't it?" Chalis said with a smile.

The fuck was that bitch talking about? He had lost. Twice. Nothing had gone well for Blados.

She continued. "After all, we got the dynamo activated, we've cast darkness across the majority of Weyard, oh, and not to forget, _I won our bet_."

Just the way she said it made Blados want to throw a fit. But he didn't, because that would be childish, and Blados was most definitely not a child. Blados was a man, the manliest there was. He was sure of it. One-hundred percent sure.

But he still wanted to punch Chalis in the face. That bitch sure knew how to piss him off.

He grunted angrily instead.

She giggled. "Now, about the payment…"

Blados' frown grew larger underneath his mask. If it were visible, it would have looked ridiculous, but fortunately it was not. The mask did have a purpose after all.  
Blados did not like being laughed at for any reason. His response to such insolence would usually be to punch the offender in the face, but he just couldn't do that with Chalis. She was too pretty. It made him mad.

She turned around swiftly and took a few steps forward, tapping her finger on her chin. "Now let's see, what shall I have you do…"

Blados wasn't listening, he was too busy looking at the way her hair swished as he turned, and how her tight dress adjusted with every flex of her—

"Oh I know!" She turned back to face him, a foul glint in her eyes, "I know _exactly_ what I'll have you do."

Blados found he was only attracted to Chalis when he was looking at her back. The front was too noisy. Wait what did she just say? He wished she'd just turn around again. _That_ was a view he could get used to.

Wait she _did _just say something didn't she? Needless to say, Blados hadn't been paying attention. At all.

She struck a pose, pointing at Blados in the overdramatic fashion she was so prone to pull. "Buy me dinner, slave!"

And what could he do? Blados had no one to blame but himself. He had seen this coming. He sighed angrily and began counting his savings, knowing he would be out several thousand gold by the end of the night.

* * *

Chalis is a big eater, I guess. Oh well. Review if you want to. Feedback and criticisms are always welcome!


End file.
